Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Wedding: Pre-Cana Chazerai

In the Roman Catholic church, the process of discussing everything that should have been discussed way long before picking a wedding date is traditionally called the pre-Cana program. Some parishes call it the marriage preparation program; so does the Episcopal church (Canon 18). It's mandatory. Never mind that we've both been previously married and are members of AARP, @RevWeb and I will have to do this.

Normally, I go ape-crazy when up against mandatory requirements, but am willing to go along with this one. Over at Greg Kandra's blog, The Deacon's Bench, I recently explained why in a comment on his post about pre-Cana classes for older couples. Ever the Seeker, I welcome opportunities for greater awareness. Remember, I'm the one who found the Catholic marriage annulment process helpful and healing. Weird, I know.

Still, I confess to being a bit apprehensive about what we might be asked to discuss. I hope it's not stuff that's so irrelevant to our lives as to be ├╝ber-absurd (e.g., family planning). 

Me? I'm interested in discussing possible points of conflict and confusion that might have an impact* on marital bliss. 

Like what? Oh, like whether "ecumenicism" is really a word or merely a post-2nd Vatican Council artifact.  Or, if Eucharist is always in its own category or might be legitimately discussed as part of liturgical theology. Or, whether General Tso's chicken is truly worth the subsequent bloat.  I don't think any Chinese food is ever worth the subsequent bloat.

* Note: "impact" not used as a verb.


  1. My most recent wedding was for a young couple who could not have children (except by adoption) because pregnancy would endanger the bride's life.

    I do appreciate this bit from the Book of Common Prayer Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage:
    "The union of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind is intended by God for their mutual joy; for the help and comfort given one another in prosperity and adversity; and, when it is God's will, for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord."

    Have fun with pre-Cana!

  2. BCP has some exquisite options and for that I am grateful. Somewhat of a challenge: music.

  3. Oh, I think Mozart would appreciate you having the family planning discussion. What if he wants to be an only child???? Seriously.....think about the kids!

    AGREE about Chinese food. Gross.

  4. I wrote in seminary on Annulment a couple of times. I think it's something we can learn a lot from.

    Good luck and I hope you have a guide that is doing things with a proper focus.


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